Schlake's Quotes File

Previous

My solution is always to go ask people in bars.

quote number 1470


Bad Toby! Bad Toby! No! Do not eat the hookers!

quote number 1469


If I get naked and ruffle with this ring it will be in the privacy of my own home.

quote number 1468


I dunno, a turf war between hookers. I'm interested.

quote number 1467


~Touch me~

...

DON'T TOUCH ME!

quote number 1466


If you turn anyone on their sides they do.

quote number 1465


I need to get me some suction cups.

quote number 1464


He likes being choked by the frog

quote number 1463


What they dont' tell you in pathfinder is that all healing potions are suppositories.

quote number 1462


I don't suppose we can count this as pickpocketing her belly button?

quote number 1461


I'm like a haggis.

quote number 1460


This would be a comedy if it wasn't so disgusting.

quote number 1459


I mean I'm no longer only female.

quote number 1458


You could have a fleshy rope terrarium.

quote number 1457


I love babies.

quote number 1456


And second, to catch the chicken sex cult in the act.

quote number 1455


I try to communicate with the intestines.

quote number 1454


It's not in me yet.

quote number 1453


I'm going to use mine on me though, none of you get to shower with me.

quote number 1452


Twenty! Suck it! Four.

quote number 1451


So we put the spider webs on the neck hole...

quote number 1450


Seduced Clark Peterson should not go on your resume.

quote number 1449


I can't believe how little you guys interact with your prostitutes.

quote number 1448


Do you want Sausage Party? I can give you Sausage Party!

quote number 1447


I don't want to run a brothel in our backyard.

quote number 1446


I don't care who she fed to him I'm going to bed.

quote number 1445


This time guys, no humping the statue.

quote number 1444


I didn't hump it, I just sat on top of it.

quote number 1443


I just apparently want a giant dog.

quote number 1442


Dye my husky red? NO!

quote number 1441


I ate one after I knew what it was.

quote number 1440


I cupped the b...

quote number 1439


We have an unlimited orphan eating machine.

quote number 1438


Oh my god he licked our asses!

quote number 1437


No one has tried to stab it inside and just hold it there.

quote number 1436


I want distribution, I don't want it to go in all in one blob.

quote number 1435


Your mother was a slightly redder cube.

quote number 1434


I hope to never write the phrase tentacle-mushroom down again.

I'm going to go touch it.

quote number 1433


You already did beastiality upstairs?

Well, we considered it.

quote number 1432


He was hanging out in back by the testicles and she climbed up on top.

quote number 1431


Well, Karlee is infertile.

quote number 1430


I can be a prostitute no matter what I end up doing.

quote number 1429


I only want to blow six guys. Maybe twelve.

quote number 1428


A dildo on a pole can be a weapon.

quote number 1427


We're going to have so many door babies, because of all the doors you are knocking up.

quote number 1426


I am purposefully not ever going to learn hip thrust.

quote number 1425


I'm still mostly a girl.

And only mostly dressed like a whore.

quote number 1424


I'm your dad, I love you. He's not your dad, he doesn't love you.

quote number 1423


Again, I'm dogged by concerns that you don't know what a blowjob is.

quote number 1422


A three and a half inch floppy is not for your penis.

Are you sure?

quote number 1421


Next